Last Updated on March 10, 2023 by Corynn
Dating comes with two main goals; to find someone who we are compatible with and who you may want to marry someday. Sometimes it’s hard to figure out if this person who you have been going out with has similar interests and morals as you. So here are 15 questions to ask if you are both compatible with each other.
1) “Do you plan on getting married in the future?”
This question can be a deal-breaker in serious relationships. If you plan on wanting to get married and your date does not. Then you both are not going to last.
2) “How do you feel about children?”
Having children can be in your partner’s plan but not in yours. You need to discuss if this will be a problem within your relationship later down the line. So if an unplanned pregnancy happens, you already had this discussion.
3) “What is your family like?”
I believe the way you are around your family reflects how you will be with your own family. Is his family loud? Is her family competitors? Or are they super quiet?
Things to consider if they will work well with your family.
4) “What are your hobbies?”
their hobbies can reflect on how you will live together. Because if his hobbies revolve around watching sports then you know he will occupy the TV during various seasons of the year. Or does his hobbies including collecting things. Where he needs space for his collectibles.
5) “How are you with cleanliness?”
Sometimes we need to compromise with this one but if you love to clean (like me!) and your partner does not then that could cause some drifts down the line. Are you willing to compromise and allow a little mess? Or do you need a super clean house no matter what?
6) “What is your 5-year plan?”
This question I feel is an important question to ask. This shows that your date is either ready to settle or they’re not. How can you find out? Easy!
Listening to the things they say. If your date says, “Oh I’m still figuring it out.” That means he’s unsure and needs time.
Another response you can get is, “Right now I’m focusing on myself and building my career.” Great! Someone with ambition! Although this shows red flags that he is not ready for a serious relationship or children/marriage is not on their mind right this instance.
Here’s another response you may get, “I’m looking to settle, get married, and possibly starting a family soon.”
You can get other responses than the ones I have mentioned. Although before you ask those questions, you need to ask yourself the same question. In order to match it with another person, you’re dating.
If he wants children in the next five years and you want to build your career, then don’t proceed. You want to be on a similar life path as your partner.
7) “What annoys you?”
Ask them what annoys them! What is their pet peeve? Sometimes people’s pet peeve could be something that you do on a daily basis. Sometimes if we really like a person we gotta compromise although for others that is a deal-breaker.
8) “What is your favorite movie? Music? Colour? Food? Season?”
These questions usually don’t matter in a serious relationship but actually it does. The similarities can help you find something to bond with. For example, if you both like horror films, that can be your thing! Watching the latest horror films in theatres.
Except if you have a completely different interest then it can hurt the relationship. For instance, let’s say you like comedy although your partner does not like any kind of stand up comedy. Could that affect the way your relationship continue?
Yes, we all hear opposites attract but only to a certain extend. Try to find someone with similar interest that helps you create that bond with each other.
9) “What does love look like to you?”
This usually brings out people’s 5 love languages. They may describe how they would like to love their partner. Such as physical intimacy, giving gifts, acts of service, quality time, and words of affirmation.
Your date may also describe how their parent’s relationship was.
10) “How do you view money?”
Asking these questions can see a glimpse of how they will handle money in the future in your relationship. Is he a saver? Or does he prefer to buy finer things in life? Does she try to catch the sales? Does she follow a budget?
Talking about money can be a sensitive subject for some but it is better to discuss it now rather than when there is a financial problem.
11) “What are your top 3 qualities you want to see in a life partner?”
Their top 3 qualities want to reflect on how you are as a person. If they are looking for someone who is loyal, trustworthy, and have a sense of humor. You should have at least 1-2 of these qualities or most likely all.
If you seem to notice both of your top 3 qualities in a partner are different from each other than I suggest you try to find someone else. Yes, compromise can be key here although, if he’s looking for flexibility and you don’t show that then lots of arguments can happen.
12) “How do you solve a conflict?”
Another important question to ask! How does your date solve a conflict? Does he stay silent during the entire problem? Does he begin to jump to conclusions? Or do they try to avoid the problem?
Both you and your partner’s way of solving the conflict can be different but it has to blend together. For example, if you need to talk about it right away and he needs time to process it. Then you can compromise, wait an hour then get back to the problem at hand.
Relationships are based on solving problems. You want to find ways on how you can solve your conflict rather than making it worse.
13) “How do you handle stress?”
This can show different sides of people. Does your partner shut down when they are stress? Do they work out? Binge-eat? Or become short-tempered?
This can be a deal-breaker for some depending on how they handle stress. So listen to what your partner says and reflect if that is what you can handle.
14) “Are you an extrovert or an introvert?”
Being an extrovert or an introvert can play the path on how compatible you are with each other. If you’re an extrovert, do you go out a lot to see your friends? Or if your partner is an introvert, do they tend to stay at home a lot?
You can find a compromise with an introvert and an extrovert being together, although it could also break a relationship. So see what you can handle.
15) “What are you afraid of?”
You can see your date becomes vulnerable at this point. Even if their fear is the dark. You are seeing a different side of them. A side you may rarely see in an early relationship.
You can tell if they are telling you their true fears or they are covering it up with a small fear they have.
Sometimes they may play it safe because your partner isn’t ready to open up. That’s fine, but you want them to open up sometime before you make the relationship serious.
There you have it! 15 questions to see if you are both compatible with each other!
Have a wonderful day!
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